The Apprentice is back with series 19, and Lord Alan Sugar is looking for "a Jeff Bezos not a bozo", but we all know which he's going to get as the long-standing BBC institution sinks to a new low.

The long-running series celebrates its 20th anniversary this year, having been on our screens every year since 2005 - except for 2020 as a result of Covid.

But, as another 18 utterly infuriating candidates line up once again, it feels like time for the BBC to fire its own show.

To borrow Lord Alan Sugar's very own words, the show has become "the biggest load of garbage I've ever seen". Here's all the reasons why the makers of The Apprentice have ruined a once great BBC institution...

The Apprentice series 19 review: It's like dumb and dumber without the laughs

When The Apprentice started 20 years ago, it quickly became a respected BBC institution. Lord Alan Sugar, then a Sir, was a respected entrepreneur who'd made millions as a self-made man. The show had a more serious air, but was still a compelling watch.

Tim Campbell won the series, and now helps Alan on the series alongside Karren Brady. The series also introduced Saira Khan, who made such an impression on the show she went on to bigger and better things.

Can you remember the last time someone made a positive impression on The Apprentice? Now the candidates all appear to be intent on making themselves look idiotic. And we're at fault for watching them like they're animals in a zoo.

Candidates have no credibility

Now I'm not one to be unkind, but surely you have to be stupid to apply these days? You would have to point a gun to my head before I said anything as infantile to camera as Amber-Rose does.

She says: "When I want something I have to have it. Sleeping is overrated. I've got really big goals to hit. I can sleep when I'm dead."

Errr, and this girl is supposed to be bright? Even my 12-year-old daughter can tell me you have to sleep to stay alive!

Another cringey soundbite sees the immediately loathsome Carlo say: "Money is what makes the world go around. My business is worth millions. Others can earn in a month what takes me one hour."

So... why has he gone begging to Lord Alan Sugar for a quarter-of-a-million-pound investment? Don't worry, though, it's unlikely he'll get as far as the final.

Meanwhile, Mia spouts: "The level of competitiveness is disgusting. I am the human equivalent of a tank. Nothing gets in my way. And the other candidates need to watch out."

I think the only thing tanking is Mia's credibility. Oh, and don't get us started on "gazumping" Nadia who tells her potential future boss: "I'm mad as a box of frogs." Well, that's the Most Annoying Person box ticked.

Apologies for the sound, it's just me grinding my teeth!

It's public humiliation - with willing candidates

Sadly, each year sees an ever-decreasing standard of candidate. And that's no doubt because a decent businessperson would run a marathon in stilletos before agreeing to taking part.

By The Apprentice series 19, we all know the 18 candidates are signing up for public humiliation. So the very nature of them taking part ruins any credibility they might have had. After all, they know EXACTLY what they are doing, and how they'll be edited.

They've all had the chance to watch the show before. Don't they learn from previous contestants' mistakes, or are they all so arrogant they think they'll behave differently? Doing a tour of the Dolomites when you don't know where they are... A parrot could repeat facts with more success.

The very essence of the show is that these candidates have to embarrass themselves on TV. And while it might occasionally be fun to watch, it's more like watching a blood sport as Alan tears them apart in the conference room.

Essentially, it's almost impossible to get behind someone whose only winning quality is that they are the least annoying person on the show. A good TV series needs heroes and villains, and there are no heroes we can root for here.

And these people won't even become famous... Can you even name any of the previous winners from the past few years, let alone the contestants?!

The interviews are too savage

On the subject of humiliation, the interview process has now become a sickeningly queasy affair.

I'm all for a bit of light ridicule when necessary. Turn up for an interview unprepared and you deserve to be embarrassed. But, in recent years, the interview episode has become painful to watch.

In a post Caroline Flack-world, where we're all encouraging others to "be kind", watching Claude Littner rips someone to shreds is just uncomfortable viewing. I mean, there's cruel to be kind, and then there's just plain cruel.

Refusing to shake a candidate's hand, and calling their business plan "a bloody disgrace" before even allowing them to speak are just two of the offences in recent years.

And, like me, many former fans of the show have been left disgusted. Viewers often turn to Twitter to express their horror at what they believe have been scenes of "bullying" and "brutality".

The Apprentice series 19 review: Change the formula

Frankly, The Apprentice needs to change the formula if it wants to win viewers back. It's feeling tired, and has to resort to mean tactics.

In the first episode of series 19, Lord Sugar's candidates are tasked with running alpine tours in Austria. After subpar ticket sales and bullish negotiations, Lord Sugar says Auf Wiedersehen to the first candidate in the boardroom. (And it's the WRONG decision).

I feel like we need some different tasks. Anybody else super bored of the same old challenges, which always include a tour, a cooking task, and the famous race to buy as many items at a discount as possible?

Bring back Nick Hewer and Margaret Mountford!

The Apprentice has been slowly sliding downhill ever since Margaret Mountford and Nick Hewer left in 2009 and 2014 respectively.

In June 2009, Margaret announced she was leaving the show at the end of series 5 in order to concentrate on her PhD. She was replaced by businesswoman Karren Brady in series 6.

Although we love Karren's bombastic side-eye, no one could ever top lawyer Maggie's disapproving eye-rolls. Just don't tell her I called her Maggie.

Nick, meanwhile, revealed he was leaving in December 2014. He decided to quit after the 10th series, believing it to be "the appropriate time". Perhaps he knew the BBC institution was fast becoming a laughing stock?

Claude Littner was Lord Alan Sugar's adviser for six seasons until he was replaced in 2022 by former Tim Campbell. And he's no Nick or Claude.

Reader, I have a confession. I do have a little sweet spot for Lord Alan Sugar. Which is why it pains me to admit the series needs culling.

At 77, the Amstrad founder is surely above all the scripted jokes he reads out every week. And who needs canned laughter when there's 18 desperate candidates willing to giggle at anything you say...?

Lord Sugar is the best thing in the show, but sadly he can't hire himself...

The Apprentice series 19 starts on Thursday, January 30, 2025 at 9pm on BBC One and iPlayer.